Run Cancer Run

Archive for December 2010

Trying not to make excuses but it is hard to start training in December.  So many things in the way like cookies and pumpkin gooey cake, and Christmas vacation with two extra kids in tow.  So I am taking this time to gather info (as indicated by my last post) and I plan to get started in January, including a physical.  So tomorrow, I resolve to call and make an appointment for my physical.  Why does this frighten me?  I guess I am afraid the doctor is going to laugh in my face.  😦

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Where to start?  Google of course.  Yes, I Googled “how to train for a marathon.”  And was immediately impressed with the amount of information available.  So far I have learned that:

1) I need to get a physical

2) I need new shoes (and have my run evaluated to make sure I get the right shoes)

3) those shoes will probably only last me about 5 months (500 miles) And I’m supposed to keep track of that?!

4) I should count on about 20 weeks of training (about 5 months)

5) I need to start of slowly so I won’t quit

6) There are actually running clubs (that cost money)!

7) There are actually Podcasts that have running music to set your pace…very interesting…

8) I guess that means I need some way to hold my iPod while running?

9) I probably will need to buy a few cute running outfits too- not to be cute, but to be warm and to look like I am supposed to be running (and to be cute)

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I decided when I jumped into this that I was not going to think.  Because thinking would make me chicken out.  Anytime I started to think… I imagined myself squishing that little thought with my hand like a little puppet mouth.  (Are you following me here?)  After all, running 26.2 miles when nobody is chasing you is not rational.

But now, I have to come up with a plan.  How am I going to get from sitting in this chair in front of a computer to running for more than 5 hours straight?  And the research begins.  And the doubts begin.  And I am squishing those doubts with my puppet hand, again.  No matter how rational they are.

So I decided that even though I don’t have my goal all fleshed out yet (what marathon am I going to run?  How am I going to raise $2000 or more?)  I need to get started.  I think since I am basically getting off of the couch and onto the running path, I better start with baby steps.  So today I am going to get out with the stroller and take a brisk 30 minute walk.  It’s a start anyway.

So after you make a decision, then tell it to a few people, it starts to sink in that you have to make it work now.  This is where I can get overwhelmed, and quick.  I could even talk myself out of it, if I tried real hard.

“Most days I don’t have time to get my own shower- how am I going to find time to run?  I can’t afford child care, to get time to run by myself.   I need to buy a bunch of stuff to run ‘cute.’  I have to give up DR Pepper!!??  You know that Christmas is coming, with all of it’s good food and Chocolate!  Just how long is one mile?  Just how long is 26.2 miles?  My knee hurts!  My back hurts!  I’ve already put my body through 3 kids, now this? ”

But the thought comes back.  All the excuses in the world, no mater how viable they are – can’t stop me from doing this.  My life will be inconvenienced.  My family will have to make sacrifices.  Does it sound familiar?  Every excuse that pops in my head gets knocked out by one thing: Mom has no choice, neither do I.  And because of that, I’ve decided to ignore the excuses.  And head in, fully to this crazy adventure.

Sometimes we have no choice.

My mother has found herself in the fight for her life.  Again.  Cancer is a word I grew up with.  Mom fought and defeated cancer 30 years ago, when I was only 4 years old.  I thought that had to be the end of it.  Everyone seems to get cancer eventually.  My mom just got it early, and won her fight.  She is a 30 year survivor of Hodgkin’s Disease.  And then last July, her second fight with cancer began.  A cancer called Multiple Myeloma.  It is a scarier cancer this time, and Survivor is not a term used for MM patients.  It is treatable, but not curable.  So Mom faces a battle, she has no choice, no matter how crazy the fight may seem.

So now to me.  What can I do about this?  Not much.  I have to just sit here 2500 miles away from her and watch her take on the fight, with the assistance of my Dad, her doctors, and her medicines.  But lately, something has been stirring in me.  A challenge that I have been stuffing down for some time now.  Every time it comes up, I think, “no way!  I can’t do that.”  Then this week it hit me.  How dare I say I can’t??  Mom doesn’t have a choice, why should I have a choice?

So here it is: I feel compelled, no, lead to train and run a marathon in support of my Mom’s fight and for raising funds for the Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation.  (More on the Foundation later)  It is absolutely crazy to think that me, a 34-year-old mother of 3 who has never run a complete mile before could just decide one day to run 26.2 of them.  If you know me, you know that this is an insane idea.  And saying it out loud sounds even more nuts.

But maybe crazy is just what I need to be… If it helps to bring a cure and the word Survivor back to my Mom’s list of accomplishments, then call me crazy.

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Run Cancer Run

Interested in my journey? Please check out the "About" page and my first post: https://runcancerrun.wordpress.com/2010/12/05/am-i-crazy-maybe/
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